I Want To Help My Spouse

Seeing the person you love change into a person they are not is a very painful experience. Often times the struggling person needs the people closest to them to set up treatment services for them. But can you get someone into treatment even if they haven’t been willing to take the step themselves? Yes! The truth is that many family members have started their recovery journey because their loved ones set up treatment services for them.

This process is not necessarily an easy process, but our counselors will help you navigate this. We will help you protect your relationship while ensuring that you are not enabling your loved one or making demands on them that simply may be producing the opposite results that you are trying to achieve.

First Step: Educate yourself. Contact us and inquire about our treatment, services, and your role in the process. Yes, you have a role. We actually prefer family members to be very involved in the treatment process from beginning to end. We also know that family members may be angry and not at a point where they can emotionally stay involved in the treatment process at this time. We will meet you where you are at and develop a plan for you that meet your needs as well.

For the Woman In Your Life
In general, women take on the responsibility of keeping the family together and taking care of the home. Internally, women feel guilty for taking care of themselves. A woman tends to put herself last on her to do list. Reassure her that it’s okay for her to go into treatment and work on herself. Give her permission to be selfish. For many women this is a foreign concept and often times is what leads to help being needed in the first place. Make a plan for her and reassure her that “you got this”. If you have children make a plan about caring for them in all of the ways that she was doing. Whatever responsibilities she had, you will need to take over for a while. Let her know how you will do this and that she doesn’t have to worry. Women worry! Let her know that you need her to do this and you will help her every step of the way.

For the Man In Your Life
In general, men take on the responsibility of being the strong one – the person who has the shoulders to cry on but who never cries on the shoulders of others. Reassure your partner that it’s okay for them to work on themselves. Make a plan that includes how you will manage things in his absence. Men are workers. Ensure that you look at all of the things that are being done by him and let him know how these things will be covered. Men can over think things. They try and “figure things out”. Reassure him that he does not have to figure out tomorrow or the next day. All he has to do is make a decision to contact us. He just has to focus on today. Reassure him that no decisions, whether they are about the relationship, family, financial, or other decisions will not be made without him and will be postponed until after he is feeling better. Tell him why you need him to get better.

You will be able to contact your loved one and they can contact you during treatment. The counseling team will direct you on safe communication. This means that in order for the person in recovery to focus on themselves, they have to not be worrying about you or outside stress. The counseling team will help you navigate conversations that will not only strengthen your relationship; it will help the healing process as well.

Contact us today for your Family Plan!